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by Von HeyDump on 07 September 2009 - 22:09
I am way to busy to sit and read here, let alone write a long explanation for why I do anything I do. I do what I want end of story, I am tired of having to stop my busy schedule and read this nonsense. For example today I was eating a dairy queen fudgie blizzard and the damn thing melted because i had to stop and get on the computer that takes 15 minutes for me to get off the couch and go into the room where we keep the computer i have to use the chair and wall to help me get out of the couch so i knocked over my blizzard and it fell into a pile of dog shit, the pile had been there for a month so it didn't mess it up to bad and we here at von heydump are big believers in the 5 minute rule. By this point i was so winded i had to have a cool compress put on my head cause i broke such a sweat sometimes when i get so sweaty it makes me have to go to the bathroom and this is a whole other problem cause the floor don't have load bearing support beams so the floor sags when i get in there so i got into the bathroom and did my business and then couldn't get off the bowl and no one was home to help me. I could see my fudgie blizzard sweatin and meltin in on the table and i was stuck on the bowl unable to reach it. I guess it's something to do with my ass and the suction on the bowl I am like a tupperwear lid on that thing and husband has to come in with a broom handle and make that burp sound in order for me to get free. I musta been stuck there for 10 minutes before one of the dogs came by and licked my ass enough to cause enough saliva to get me off that thing. Jesus I wish they made diapers my size it would make my life easier being so busy. then I had to get back up to the room where the computer is managed to get on the desk chair lucky we got a metal one i broke the last 4 wood ones. cheap pieces of crap. No workmanship anymore who hears of a delicate lady like me sitting on chairs and them breaking. I should kill them bastards that make them chairs.
so i get on the chair and see i left my fudgie blizzard in the other room dammit. Now I gotta get back up and make my way into the other room and get the damned thing and hope it don't spill i only got these 1 set of pants, it aint fair that layne bryant has changed to the sizes for all them tiny girls and still keep the sizes the same. 4XL aint the 4XL it used to be. So now I got one pair of these sweat pants that i wear all week and husband lays them in the back of the pick up and takes them through the car wash to wash them once a week while the kids hose me down in the back yard.. somebody thought it was a good idea to make showers for skinny people and me an average 300+lb lady can't fit in them damned skinny showers.it's just not fair.
Where was i, I forget the kids did a crap job of hosing me and i can smell the mold in the flaps on my arms.
I am too busy to stop what i am doing and come here to tell you all my doings, After i got back in the room with the fudgie blizzard and got back in the metal chair in front of the computer i was sweating like a stuck pig, lucky for me kid number 2 came in and was able to turn the computer on for me my arms don't reach the button and i had to have kid 2 lift my stomach up to get to the key board.
but here i am stopping my busy day to come here and see what you say about me. I am just to busy i have a life and things to do, I have to make my way out to the car because husband says we can go to popeyes tonight for some chicken and beans i am too busy. this place makes me have gas, Dammit I just crapped my pants, see what this site does to me i am too busy for this shit.
so i get on the chair and see i left my fudgie blizzard in the other room dammit. Now I gotta get back up and make my way into the other room and get the damned thing and hope it don't spill i only got these 1 set of pants, it aint fair that layne bryant has changed to the sizes for all them tiny girls and still keep the sizes the same. 4XL aint the 4XL it used to be. So now I got one pair of these sweat pants that i wear all week and husband lays them in the back of the pick up and takes them through the car wash to wash them once a week while the kids hose me down in the back yard.. somebody thought it was a good idea to make showers for skinny people and me an average 300+lb lady can't fit in them damned skinny showers.it's just not fair.
Where was i, I forget the kids did a crap job of hosing me and i can smell the mold in the flaps on my arms.
I am too busy to stop what i am doing and come here to tell you all my doings, After i got back in the room with the fudgie blizzard and got back in the metal chair in front of the computer i was sweating like a stuck pig, lucky for me kid number 2 came in and was able to turn the computer on for me my arms don't reach the button and i had to have kid 2 lift my stomach up to get to the key board.
but here i am stopping my busy day to come here and see what you say about me. I am just to busy i have a life and things to do, I have to make my way out to the car because husband says we can go to popeyes tonight for some chicken and beans i am too busy. this place makes me have gas, Dammit I just crapped my pants, see what this site does to me i am too busy for this shit.
by Red Sable on 07 September 2009 - 22:09
LOL, sounds like you fit right in here!
by steve1 on 08 September 2009 - 10:09
Agreeing with Red Sable But you had best get off your Fat A-- and lose some weight may make you a bit more mobile
Steve
Steve
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