Schhbabe! - Page 2

Yes I'm selling my dog.  :(  This has been hard on me, but I feel that under the circumstances it is the right decision.  I never expected events to turn out like this.  Back in April my husband and I went to an Ivan seminar and Ben really got turned on by the Mali's.  He told me that he would get into the sport if he could get a Mali pup.  We did and he loves her.  This has been my dream... to have a life partner that shared my passion for SchH, and that we could train our dogs together. 

Life has a funny way of throwing curve balls, however.  We had just got the puppy when the local bike shop unexpectedly went for sale.  This has been Ben's life dream... to own Vienna Bicycle Shop, so I agreed that we should buy it, not really knowing what I was signing up for.  Neither one of us has owned a small business before, and right now we're the only employees.  Until we get the business loan paid off we won't make enough money to hire staff to help, so for the next 5 years, we're running the shop, as well as working our primary full time jobs. 

We sold our beautiful home in the country and moved into a run-down older house close to the bike shop to get a lower mortgage note.  We had just remodelled it too.  (Not that I'm bitter about it! Grrrr.)

Alrightly then.  Enough of me belly aching.  All the bitchin' and moanin' in the world can't turn back time.  There's no way to go but forward.  I barely have time for one dog, and it's going to be the Mali because that's the breed of choice for the hubby.  One day this will all work out for good, someway somehow.  Chaco needs an active, working home.  He'll get love and exercise till we find the right home, but formal training just ain't gonna happen. 

On the other hand, the hubby is still available but no one has expressed interest, much to my disappointment.  Ladies, you are seriously undervaluing this top prospect.  Not only does he never leave the toilet seat up, but most of the time the dirty clothes make it to the hamper instead of the floor.  Did I mention he's an excellent bicycle mechanic?  Handy around the hosue?  Skilled at home remodelling? 

Alight I'll just shut up now.  Enough of the pity party, eh?

Yvette

Oh, Yvette! That totally sucks! I'm so sorry to hear that.  I wish I could think of a better way to say it but  I'm just going to stay with THAT TOTALLY SUCKS! You know, keeping a stiff upper lip is a good way to go. Just don't forget to feel what you're feeling along the way too. Otherwise you might find yourself feeling it all in one lump sum when you least expect it. Take it from one who knows.

Warm regards,

Dawgs

Dawgs, I appreciate the sentiment, but in reality it could be A LOT worse.  I could be selling Chaco because... well... what if it were something like... a serious illness?  a death in the family?  a job loss? 

I remind myself how lucky I am in life.  This bike shop is currently kicking my butt, but in the long run it's my retirement plan.  Once we get the biz loan paid off and house loan paid off, and a few employees... I can quit my day job at the chemcial plant and then I'll have plenty of time for bikes and dogs.

In the meanwhile, I'll make the best of a bad situation, take my licks, and move on.  What else is there to do, right?  I bet there are hundreds of people who drift in and out of this discussion board with hardships far worse than any I've ever faced.  What if, instead, we faced a disabling car wreck?  A fire or a flood?  A child with an incurable disease?

I'm trying to remember who was it that said, "Always be kind to others, for you never know what grief they bear silently."

I'm sorry to hear that you're selling your lovely dog, but let me say how much I admire you for your devotion to your family life.  It's refreshing to see.

Now about that husband.....
Barb single in Oregon

Believe me I know the angst of opening a new business! 

My husband did so last January and things are going well, but it's very stressful when you sign you life away on those business loans that have your house at collateral.  :)

I wish you both all the best and hope all your dreams come true ..:0 )

so how come husband gets his dream business, dream dog, gets to train in Schutzhund with your help (if you don't have time to train your dog, where is he finding the time to train his?) - and you have to give up your dog?  Don't understand - where is the compromise?  I couldn't do it, that's for sure - how about you help him with his dream business, you give up your home and move into a small cheaper one for his dream business, you keep your dog and get to do Schutzhund (if you want) and he gives up his extras including his dog?   - glad I'm not married, no way no how would I give up my dog or things I like to do, to realize someone else's dream.

SchHBabe,

I've been in a spot similar to yours exactly 10 yrs ago.  My life was going great.  Had a great job, wonderful husband, brand new home, a beautiful 3 yr old son and had just started breeding gsds (my life long dream).  Everything was going along perfectly.  This was where I was supposed to be. 

It didn't last long.  I was sidelined by what you described above.  My little boy had just turned 3 and two days after his birthday was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia.  My entire world fell apart.  I immediately quit my job to be at the hospital 24/7.  I had to find homes for my two dogs (one of whom was my confidant and best friend); a few years down the road, my husband and I were too stressed by illness and depression and the marriage fell apart; soon after, I moved out of my beautiful home.  My life turned totally backwards.

But, things change and for every door that closes another opens somewhere else.  I have always found that there's something greater waiting on the other side...it may take a while to get there. 

Fast forward 10 years.

I'm remarried.  My son triumphed thru the cancer and is a very healthy 13 year old now.  I have another son (now 3), I am working a decent job (perhaps not as good as the other but, sufficient for what I need), currently renting due to proximity of hubby's job (only temporarily) and have recently returned to the world of gsds.  It has been a slow process but, a good one.  My two dogs....well, there was happiness and heartache.  My female has since passed on and my male is in a home being spoiled with two little boys that love him like crazy.  The good news is, I've learned a heck of a lot about life in this process.  NOTHING is more important to me than my boys and their continued good health.  My husband and dogs are right up there but, must admit, they are second.  My job, my home and everything else are just instruments in my life.  God has given me what I have and I will be forever grateful that He spared my son.  I also learned that life is short...oh so very short.  You must grab hold of your dreams and goals and go after them with gusto.  As the saying goes, "noone is promised tomorrow".  Oh, how true. 

I applaud you for standing by your hubby and his dreams and thru his dreams, I feel yours will be realized also. 

Good luck finding a good working home for Chaco.  I'm sure you'll miss him but, you're doing the right thing for him if you already know you will not have the time and energy to do what you feel you needed to do by him.  I never regretted placing my dogs.  I was not there physically or emotionally when my son became ill.  It would not have been fair to them. 

Molly, you've touched a nerve here to be sure!  And a raw one at that! 

All those points you mention have been thrown like grenades at hubby, repeatedly.  We never used to fight.  We just got married in October.  We're supposed to be in that euphoric honeymoon stage of blissful marriage, not at each other's throats.  I'm not going to air the dirty laundry on a public board, but believe me, every point you mentioned has been used to verbally blugeon the guy.

But I have a confession to make... I love this man.  He's been the best thing that has happened to me since I moved to this hee-haw hillbilly state.  If you're single, darling, then take my advice and don't fall in love because the consequences are severe.  The "hubby for sale" ad is a joke, and a manifestation of my angst.  But I confess... I'm positively smitten. 

As for "psycho puppy" aka the Mali-gator... this pup is way too much dog for hubby to train as a first-timer.  She's going to be a tough nut to crack.  She's only 4 maybe 5 months old but has already shown her colors.  She is a dominant, hard little bitch.  Her temperament is nothing like Chaco.  This little heathen, as a 12 week old puppy, would turn and bite when she got a mild correction.  Oy vey!  So I took over the role of trainer, as he was ill-prepared to handle such a dog.  She respects me now, but not him.  Heh heh heh.

Never fall in love, it's a dangerous thing. 

I try to rationalize the situation.  Chaco should be an easy dog to place because he's an easy dog to train.  Not dominant.  Not hard.  Not a fighter.  Not a nerve bag.  He's just a fun loving dog who loves to play and loves to please.  "Psycho puppy" on the other hand, is a going to be a challenge as I will have to adapt my training style to match her temperament. 

But is this easy?  Hell no.  I started this post at 4 AM because I can't sleep.  I'm afraid I've said too much already.  This is a public forum, and it's dangerous thing to be too open about one's feelings, especially on this forum, so I better end this post.