OT... Need a laugh? - Page 3

LMFAO keep em coming guys

That's another cracker!!!!!! liz

A Cajun walks into a bar with a pet alligator by his side.

He puts the alligator up on the bar.

He turns to the astonished patrons.   "I'll make you a deal.   I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my manhood inside.   Then the gator will close his mouth for one minute.   He'll then open his mouth and I'll remove my unit unscathed.   In return for witnessing this spectacle, each of you will buy me a drink."

The crowd murmured their approval.

The man stood up on the bar, dropped his trousers, and placed his privates in the alligator's open mouth.   The gator closed his mouth as the crowd gasped.   After a minute, the man grabbed a beer bottle and rapped the alligator hard on the top of its head.   The gator opened his mouth and the man removed his genitals unscathed as promised.

The crowd cheered and the first of his free drinks were delivered.

The man stood up again and made another offer.  "I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try".

A hush fell over the crowd.

After a while, a hand went up in the back of the bar.   A blonde woman timidly spoke up.   "I'll try it, but you have to promise not to hit me o

Makes a good change to have a laugh, here's another one

Miss Beatrice, the church organist was in her eighties and had never married.

She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all.

One aternoon the Pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room, and invited him to take a seat while she prepared tea.

As he sat facing her old Hammond Organ, the young Minister noticed a Cut Glass Bowl sitting on top of it.

The Bowl was filled with water, and in the water floated of all things :A Condom'.

When she returned with the Tea and Scones, they began to chat.

The Pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and it;s strange floater, but soon it got the better of him, and he could no longer resist.

Miss Beatrice, he said, I wonder if you would tell me about this, pointing to the bowl,

Oh' Yes' she replied' Isn't it wonderful?

I was walking through the Park a few months ago, and i found this little package on the ground.

The Directions said to place it on the Organ; Keep it Wet' and that it would prevent the spread of Disease.

Do you Know, I haven't had the Flu all Winter.

YOUR AGE BY EATING OUT

Don't tell me your age; you probably would tell a falsehood anyway - but your waiter may know!

YOUR AGE BY DINNER & RESTAURANT MATH

This is pretty neat

DON'T CHEAT BY SCROLLING DOWN FIRST!

It takes less than a minute. Work this out as you read .

Be sure you don't read the bottom until you've worked it out!

This is not one of those waste of time things, it's fun.

1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to go out to eat. (More than 1 but less than 10.)

2. Multiply this number by 2 (just to be bold).

3. Add 5.

4. Multiply it by 50.

5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1758...

If you haven't, add 1757.

6. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born.

You should have a three digit number

THIS IS THE COOL PART.....

The first digit of this was your original number (i.e., how many times you want to go out to restaurants in a week)

The next two numbers are....

YOUR AGE ! ~~~ Oh YES, it is!

2008 IS THE ONLY YEAR THIS WILL EVER WORK, SO SPREAD IT AROUND WHILE IT LASTS .