New sign for I can make it to the gate in less than 3 seconds, Can You? - Page 4

Jehova's Witnesses - That reminds me of a story........

Once many years ago, I was about 8 months pregnent and digging fence posts, because neighbors dogs chased my horse throught the woden fence and which resulted in 42 stitches in the face of my best show horse. The electric fence was only about 20' long and the charger was strong enough to fence in up to 1/4 mile. I told them not to touch the wire as I let them say their piece.

Well about 3 minutes into their lecture, one of them grabbed the wire.  It must have been one hell of a shock, because not only did the guy jump 3 feet into the air but he also pissed himself! I did my best not to laugh, and quitely told him that next time he aught to listen a little better and that it was time for them to go. That was the last time any of them ever came back.

I love it! People ask me if my dog likes children. I usually say "Yes. But they give him indigestion."

Some good ideas on how to keep the Jehovah's Witnesses away. The Mormons were easy enough to get rid of. I usually send my wife out there to talk to them. She had them standing there for over an hour, swatting mosquitoes. Needless to say, they never came back. I thought SHE was going to convert THEM!

I got permission to hang this one up as needed:

NEVER MIND THE DOG... MY WIFE IS HORMONAL AND PACKING HEAT.

Sunsilver, when a rescue dog of mine bit an innocent walker-by, the police who wrote up the bite/vicious dog report recommended we post BEWARE OF DOG signs. That dog has been gone many years, but the signs remain, as does his legacy, no matter what dog has since filled in his footpads.

Sitasmom, a few years back the Mormons were on a trek for some reason or another and like the Jehovah's, they just keep on keeping on. It was 99 degrees and that same crazy dog who bit the walker (THEY TOTALLY IGNORE THE SIGNS), made no bones about what he wanted for snack time. And yet, those plastered smiles never left their faces, while dripping sweat by the bucket loads in their long sleeved underwear and white shirts. DH gave them each a tall cold, glass of iced water, which I'm ashamed to say, never crossed my mind.

Just read the list...Haven't read this thread in a while.  I laughed so hard!  Loved the story, SitasMom!  I wonder if the poor Jehovah's guy ever lived that down...You can bet, when they got back into the car, that the one who didn't get shocked laughed his butt off at the one who did.  Human nature, and all that.

Maybe I should put hotwire across my front porch, and a sign that says "DO NOT TOUCH". A good shock and I bet they'd leave me alone, too.

I've got to get "We don't dial 911".  Also, I love "Cross the Line, Your Ass Is Mine".

The chainsaw incident was hilarious, Habanero...Wish I could have seen it.  My hubby would appreciate that one, too.

So many good signs...Love them.

I don't have any signs up at all.  No one ever comes to see me, and no one comes into my yard.  So no biggie on the signs.  Plus, Moons has a point about the liability issue. I'd be concerned about that.

Still, Love the signs, would like to have all of them!! LOL!!

Crys

I saw one on Ebay with a dog silhouette that said "I eat meat..... any kind of meat"