Opposites :) or :( ,,,, ? - Page 6

YR, that makes me really sad for you, I was hoping you finally found that diamond, but I guess not.  I hope you can work things out and at least find some common ground, that just sucks.  I do, however, find it ironic that all of the duds you found were on Christian dating sites, all church-goes, all dishonest and all after just one thing.  You'd have been better off sticking with the secular sites, at least they're more honest about their intentions!

Is there anyone on here that is actually happy in their relationship?

Or is everyone MISERABLE? LOL

 

You can't have a relationship with a cloned person, it would bore you to death. But I think for a realationship to thrive you must have a lot of the same interests.

Why would you want to be with someone who doesn't like the same vacation spots, doesn't like the same restaurants, same TV programs etc., etc. There has to be a lot of similarities or common ground or you are eventually doomed IMO.

I find this thread funny and ironic? Am I missing posts? How are all of you giving advice and opinion without asking pretty important questions? Is this a pm fest? Or do some of you just know everyone without asking anything?

So this guy worships Satan and renounces God, since you are opposites? Hmmm. Odd you even spent more than a second with this guy.

Mountain Lion said it best me thinks.

 

Don't worry Shtal, I don't take Vk too seriously. :) 

 

I do agree with Travels about the men on the sites you are apart of.  Yuck YR, you probably would have better luck in a bar.

Seriously though, I'd rather be single. 

I pretty much agree with you ML, but I guess you list "things" in order of importance, while I'd list personality first.  TV, eh, I'm not that much of a watcher, I don't even have cable.  It wouldn't so much bother me if I were with someone who like watching, so long as it wasn't to excess.  I don't think I'd mind a mate doing anything I don't like to do, as long as it's not to excess and he still liked doing the things we would have in common.  I like to be secure enough to know that individual time is also important, I don't think it's healthy to be a complete extension of each other, too much time and room for conflict!  I could list a lot of things that were wrong with my 35 year marriage that ended in divorce, but it had to do more with the disrespect for the wishes of a family member, more than anything else, combined with a cynicism of life and people in general (the X's cynicism, that is) that grew with age.  As he got older, he focused more and more on what he "hated", than what he loved.*  I'm the eternal optimist and negativity is something I can't live with, I need levity.  I guess I've guided my wonder more to the natural world and a good sunrise, sunset or rainbow still stops me in my tracks and to him, that all got boring.  He was a non-practicing Christian, but he still has "faith" and that, in particular, was never a problem between us.

Sex is the one thing that I think is an instant deal breaker, though.  A very wise woman I once knew used to say "When you have a good sex life, it makes up about 10% of your relationship, but if you have a bad sex life, that goes up to about 90%."  I agree with that, it should complement a strong relationship, not encompass it.  That's one area where compatibility is paramount, IMO. 

On a personal note, I have a success story, well, until recently anyway.  My mother is Roman Catholic, my father is a baptized Lutheran.  When they got married, my father did not want to convert, so they weren't allowed to marry on the altar.  They were married by a priest in the Rectory and their marriage was blessed as long as my father agreed that any children be raised Catholic.  Ironically, his father changed from Roman Catholicism to Lutheran for my grandmother.  Anyway, my father was mum about his faith or lack thereof, because he was holding up his end of the bargain.  I do remember a few times he got aggravated, but not until I was in high school.  I got detention once for talking to boys at the bus stop after school and my father adamantly refused to allow me to be punished.  He called the principle and told her he was sending me there for an education and the aim was not the convent, if that was not my choice.  He made sure I wasn't kissing the kid or doing anything but talking before he made the call.  My mother didn't disagree.

My mother is still a devout Catholic and my father still doesn't reveal his opinion on spirituality, to him, it's personal and that, I respect.  They will have been married for 63 years come December.

*Example:  He was always an early riser and he went into a rant one day when he called a friend who was still in bed at 9 a.m. on a Saturday.  He got off the phone and berated him for 10 minutes!  I stood there with a slack jaw and just walked away, shaking my head.  What could I say at that point?

That explains it. Finally.

Explains exactly what, beetree?  How about we examine you now? 

You have, already been done.

I could be wrong, but I think Bee meant your strict Catholic upbringing  turned you off of 'religion'.

I think that turns off a lot of people.